When was the last time you found a few minutes to sit in silence and actually hear your own thoughts?
You know, a moment when you don't have a child hanging on your leg, begging for a snack, a drink, your time, your attention, or for you to be their Barbie playmate.
Or a free moment of not feeling the pressure of the household chores tugging at you.
I don't know about you, but when I'm feeling weary and haven't had much time for myself I become very cranky and very impatient. I don't respond to my family with grace and I often wish I would tame my tongue. But by the time I feel that way, it's often too late. I've already said something not so loving or mom-like.
Thankfully, over time God has revealed to me what my limits are. So when I feel like I just want to hide in a closet and cry, I know it's time to be "tagged out" and enjoy some much needed mommy time. But it's really much better to avoid reaching my boiling point in the first place. With regular mommy time woven into our daily routine, I find I'm a much happier person overall.
It's healthy and important for all moms to get some "Me Time."
Here are ten ways to ensure you're getting the mommy time you deserve:
1. Take up running. Or join a gym and workout regularly. Many gyms offer childcare. I've found running to be an effective "escape" for me. It re-energizes my spirit and my mind. And I benefit from the feel-good endorphins for hours afterward, so my mood is more pleasant.
2. Schedule a mommy shopping trip. Let the kids have a scheduled afternoon of hanging out with daddy, while you get away to shop a little bit. Some women I know use this opportunity for grocery shopping, while others like to just go to the local mall.
3. Get together regularly with a moms group. If you aren't part of a women's group in your community, check with your local church and get involved. I meet once a week with the moms in a women's bible study group. Childcare is always arranged for the two hours we have to enjoy fellowship with each other, talk about our latest book, discuss our prayer request or praises, and pray for each other. And my kids have FUN playing with the other kids.
4. Sneak into the bathroom with your favorite book or magazine. Do this when your hubby or another responsible adult is home to keep an eye on the kids. Just take 10 or 15 minutes for yourself. Nobody will bother you when the bathroom door is closed…unless of course your family has an "open door" policy. In my house, there is a strict "Do Not Disturb" bathroom rule. Everybody deserves a little privacy.
5. Take advantage of nap time. When the kids are napping or having their quiet time, don't use that time to do the dishes or dust the furniture. Lay down and take a nap with them. Or plop down on the couch with a magazine and a cup of tea. Hey, you might even enjoy watching some daytime television for an hour or getting caught up on your favorite television show on the DVR.
6. Wake up early. Rise before the chaos begins. I get up at 5:30 every morning. This gives me an opportunity to spend time in the presence of God, pray, and study His word. I also use this time to get my writing accomplished, which is something I have a passion for and I find it to be very therapeutic. Getting up early also allows me to plan our day out without having the kids standing at my side asking, "mommy, what fun things are we going to do today?"
7. Plan 30 minutes of FREE time in your daily or weekly routine. Discuss the plan with your children and have something for them to do during that 30 minutes. Let them watch TV, or set them up with some Play Dough. Or maybe this is a good time for coloring books and crayons. Make sure they know you get to have FREE time too. During that time, check your email or surf the internet. Whatever it is, just make sure you're doing something for yourself.
8. Exchange play dates with a friend. This is a great way to get a few hours to yourself without having to pay a babysitter. One day, you host the playdate at your house so your friend can have her mommy time. The next day, she hosts the playdate at her house. Note: this is a playdate where you drop the kids off and leave to do whatever you want. Don't feel obligated to stick around and chat with the other mom. Go take care of your personal needs for a few hours.
9. Visit relatives with kids. Once a week, we go to my husband's parents house for dinner. Of course, grandma and grandpa don't have other little kids running around their house, but they do live in a neighborhood full of friendly kids who are always outside looking for someone to play with. So inevitably, the grownups pull up a chair outside and relax while the kids are busy playing with friends. These moments are good because you aren't necessarily "on call" to entertain anyone. And you can enjoy grownup conversation without interruptions. I often take a magazine with me or play Scrabble on my iPhone.
10. Put the kids to bed early. There is nothing wrong with putting your children in bed at 7pm and taking the night off. Kids need their sleep, especially during the school year. If it's too hard to get everyone in bed that early, plan normal nighttime routines for earlier in the day. For example, when I know I want to get the kids in bed early on a particular night, I will plan some outdoor water play in the afternoon before dinner. Then when they're tuckered out and ready to go inside, they go straight into the bathtub for cleanup. Then into their pajamas. Then I fix dinner while they watch a movie. After dinner, they brush their teeth, we read, and they're in bed. Easy peasy!
~Until next time, may God bless you with a few minutes to nurture your own needs!
Rosann Cunningham
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yes to all 10!! wonderful ideas and great reminders to make sure I'm fitting in "mommy time".
Yay Heather!
Glad to give you some great reminders.
Blessings,
Rosann
Awesome list!! Yes ... having mommy time is so important! We need to take of ourselves first ... that way we're in a better position to take care of our families. I write each day about having a Mom-ME Moment on my blog. I invite you to check it out.
http://www.MommyMindSpa.com
Big hugs from VoiceBoks!!
xoxoxo
Ro
Ro, I love your blog! Glad you're finding some much needed mommy time too and sharing those moments with other moms!
Blessings,
Rosann
So helpful! I too found it really helpful to take up running and join a gym. We love the daycare there and I feel like the kids are getting to play with kids in a different environment while I get a workout in. Win! Win!
Callie, yes it is a win-win!
When I work out at our gym, my girls go in the daycare room as well and they LOVE playing with the other children there. It's like a fun playdate for them. Also, our gym has an indoor pool, so I often end up taking them swimming after I exercise. Thanks so much for stopping by and for your comment. It's much appreciated.
Blessings,
Rosann
Great list! I find that waking up before my kids is really important. Though, my girls just *know* when I wake up early and I think make it their mission to wake up early one those days too. Sigh. But, when I get 30-45 minutes in the morning completely alone, it makes a huge difference. Makes the day a lot better then starting it off with demands from the littles.
LOL! I know Sarah, sometimes I face the same challenge with my girls.
There are literally mornings where I tiptoe around the house because I don't want them to hear the creaks in the floor as I walk down the stairs to have my time with the Lord. And there's usually at least once every week or so when Faith wakes up extra early and plops down on the couch next to me while I'm studying God's word. Then of course, it's "whatcha doing mommy?" and "what are you writing down?" or "I'm hungry mommy....can I watch TV?"
Great list! Definitely need to get back running. Maybe when munchkin 3 is sleeping through the night completely!
Wonderful list!! Running has been great for me, and my hubby and I often have date nights in with take out and early bedtimes for the kiddos. Mine don't nap anymore, but we'll do a quiet hour in their rooms a couple of times per week when I just chill and enjoy the silence.
Christine, you made me laugh when you mentioned an hour of quiet time. With my oldest daughter, when we transitioned her out of naps we decided to have her do quiet time for an hour instead of the nap. The only problem was that she would yell out of her bedroom every five minutes..."is my quiet time over yet?" It was so annoying. So we finally just accepted it as a lost battle and found other ways to enforce quiet time where it didn't feel like quiet time.
Blessings,
Rosann
I think I need a little mommy time right now. My daughter is tugging on my arm saying mommy mommy.
She has been a bit needy this morning. I might just have to lock myself in the bathroom for a minute or two!! 
Rachael, go take your mommy time. Yes, start in the bathroom...just don't think about potty training while you're there!
You aren't alone on that one. I'm attempting to potty train Abby too.
Blessings,
Rosann
Great post, Rosann! Really encouraging ideas, so true! Thank you.
Tara, thanks for stopping by. Glad you liked this post!
Many blessings,
Rosann
Waking up early is indeed an excellent way to get time on your own. I love the peace and calm of the morning and that I can walk around and don't have to make juice or talk about the importncae of brushing your teeth when you get up! lol. Love them all really! First ime visit from stumble. Glad to have found your blog. Nina
Nina, thanks for stopping by and sorry for my delayed response. I'm actually on vacation...and believe it or not...it's totally dark in the house we are staying in...I'm laying on the floor on my tummy...catching up on blogging stuff while my daughter's are asleep in the bed right above me. This is a first! LOL! Pretty sad when I feel like I have to sneak in my blogging time after everyone is asleep.
Blessings,
Rosann
Rosann, First, thanks for joining The Woman Jesus Knows. I am a SAHM and even though my daughters are 21, 19, and 16, I am still a busy mom. Reading in the bathroom, to me is important because, it is often the one place I can be alone at certain times. Believe it or not I still have to steal away to blog or work on other writing endeavors. Barnes and Nobles has become my getaway
. I plan to pass your suggestions and you blog address to some of the young women in my former Sunday school class (recently relocated). I pray God's favor and blessings on your ministry as you continue to write for His glory.
Because Jesus lives,
Anita
Thanks so much for stopping by Mamas Like Me! I'm so glad to have found your blog! I love these tips - and use many of them around our house! I find that if I can just get 15 minutes to myself in the morning to get dressed and prepared before facing the day, I am a much happier Mommy
Following you now and looking forward to reading much more!
Tina, so glad you are intentionally setting time aside for your mommy time each day. All moms need and deserve it!
Blessings,
Rosann
This is a great list Rosann! I like sneeking into the bathroom with a magazine;)
Thanks Courtney... I take my Kindle in there and just lose myself for 15 minutes or so...but I sit on the side of the bathtub...or sometimes the floor.
The toilet makes my feet fall asleep! Lol!
This is so helpful. I need to try some of these things. Sometimes it's nice to have a break even if it's only for a few minutes :0)
Oh my goodness, I needed this. I think I am going to read your article everyday. Yes, I do need to get up super early and spend time with God. I miss reading my Bible so much. I pray everyday for the Lord to remind me to read but I end up going through my whole day busy, scatter brained and overtired to do much of anything. I am a new mommy and I feel like I don't know what I am doing sometimes. I am married to a wonderful godly man and I love taking care of him and our beautiful son, but sometimes I feel like I am going to kill over dead. I am also trying to finish up my bachelor's degree and not doing very well with prioritizing my time to get my school work done. I also stay up way too late just to have some me time and then starting my mornings off late and unorganized because of it. Sigh.....Even though I feel like I am failing at the moment, I know God still loves me and wants me to spend time with Him. Matthew 6:33 "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given unto you." This is what I will do, I will begin to start with God first in the morning pray and spend time with with Him and giving Him my day unto Him. Thanks for letting me vent.....
Blessings. Overwhelmed but very blessed Mommy and Wife!
Overwhelmed Mommy, I'm so glad you found this to be a helpful resource! Thank you for your wonderful comment. I know all too well about staying up too late at night for ME time and then being exhausted the next day. It becomes a vicious cycle if we aren't careful. You're welcome to stop by and vent here anytime.
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