The Truth About Stubborn Pride

Stubborn pride.  I don't know about you, but these two words describe a handful of people I love.  Little stings my heart more than a loved one refusing my assistance because of their stubborn pride.  Unfortunately, I'm all too often guilty of doing the same to others who try to help me.  I suppose the apple doesn't fall far from the tree when it comes to taking on family traits.

What about you?  Are you or is someone you know filled with a little too much pride, making it a dramatic ordeal when a member of the body of Christ offers a gift of love or performs an act of kindness?

What happens when the smoothness of life one day comes to an end?  Being Christian doesn't mean we'll be free from heartache or life trials.  At some time or another, we all find ourselves in less than ideal situations, even those where we have no choice but to ask for, or at the very least, accept help from others.

Illness happens, knocking you into doctor prescribed bed rest.  How will you care for your home, handle meals, or get the kids to soccer practice?  

An unexpected job layoff results in lack of money to pay this month's rent?  There are no other promising job opportunities at the moment and you have a family to take care of.  What are you going to do?

A tragic death in the family leaves you emotionally paralyzed.  Before you know it, everything else in life becomes a chaotic mess.  It's overwhelming and you don't know where or how to begin fixing it. 

Divorce results in life as a single parent.  How will you be both mom and dad to your children when the other parent lives so far away or is otherwise absent.  How will you juggle raising good kids with the responsibility of working full time?

None of us want to feel like we have to depend on others for the things we need - be it love, money, time, or wisdom.  After all, we are grownups.  Our parents raised us to be creative, problem solving, self-sufficient, determined adults.  Therefore we should be able to handle our needs on our own, right?   In fact, some people {maybe you} have always trudged through life alone, knowing no other way.

Photobucket Image e1334589456453 The Truth About Stubborn Pride

How do we cope with these difficult situations?

Or better yet, how should we respond when we need help?

Are we supposed to put giant walls of pride up around ourselves, being martyrs to our circumstances?

I'm an honest, hard working person.  I'll just get a 2nd job. 

I'll figure out something. 

I don't need help.  I'm perfectly capable all on my own? 

I don't want to owe anything to anyone?

I don't need your money.  I'll find another way.  

Sound familiar?

Let's remember, giving is considered an act of love, not an act of pity.

When someone offers to help us in our time of need, regardless of what kind of help it is, they are doing so out of love.  They are doing so because it's the right thing to do.  They are doing so because that's what being a Christian is all about.  It's about God's command to love others.

Friend, God is using that person as a tool to pour His blessing onto us.  And instead of lovingly accepting His blessing, we are proudly beating our chests as we proclaim "I don't need it."

The bottom line:  Pride is a sin.  God wants us to have a humble heart.  He wants us to recognize we can't do this thing called life, without Him. 

When we let our stubborn pride control our decisions or our words, it's not much different than taking personal credit for the successes or all the wonderful things we do have.  We aren't showing gratitude nor are we giving God the glory for what He has done for us.

Yes, I said it.  What HE has done for us.

We need to look around at our countless blessings.  We didn't create those on our own.  God is responsible for them.  Not us.

I know!  It's a tough nut to swallow.  The truth is painful.  We don't mean to be disrespectful to the gifts God is trying to give us.   We simply don't want to be a burden to others.

God didn't create us to march through life alone.  He created us {a part of the body of Christ} for His glory.   So when we openly accept love and help from our family and friends, we are embracing an opportunity to give God the glory He deserves instead of snuffing our noses at His blessings.

Let's choose to give God the glory.

Open your arms friend.  Receive God's blessing with gratitude and a humble heart.

We need Him.  We need the body of Christ.

Let's go forward saying No to pride and Yes, Please to gifts of love.


Did you know The Truth About Stubborn Pride

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 The Truth About Stubborn Pride
Rosann is wife to the man of her dreams and stay-at-home mom to two delightful little girls. Her heart's greatest passions are loving her family well, long-distance running, writing, and pretty much anything dark chocolate peanut butter. Rosann loves to encourage women whose husbands are in a season of unemployment, at her other website Her writing inspiration comes from a strong desire to glorify God while sharing the heart of her journey through a life of faith. She is also the Author of two books - UnEmployed Faith: Clothing Yourself in Strength and Perseverance Through his Season of Unemployment, and Refuel Your Inner SuperMom: A Practical Guide to Getting Your Groove Back.
 The Truth About Stubborn Pride

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  1. Kathy

    I struggle with this all the time, the "I don't need any help, I'm just fine" syndrome. I think it's very hard for women, mom's in particular to say they need help. We are so conditioned to do it all by ourselves. This is something I'm working on for myself. Thanks for a great post!

    • Rosann

      You're right Kathy! Moms in particular struggle with stubborn pride. It's the supermom syndrome. {ahem} :-)

      I appreciate your visit, friend.

  2. aurie

    Very, very true - and exactly what I needed to read today! Thank you!!

    • Rosann

      Aww, thank you Aurie! Always such a pleasure and honor to have you stop by here. :)

  3. Nikki

    Wonderful reminder! It's in the humbling that we really grasp grace, isn't it. . .
    striving to say yes right away...for that's where I struggle most.

    All for Him,

    • Rosann

      Nikki, your visits here always bless me. Thank you for your beautiful blogging mama friendship. :)

  4. Pamela R

    So true!!!
    I was always tought our "gifts" are always to bring GOD glory... when we need help and someone offers it esp a brother/sister in the LORD if we refuse it--we only are negating a blessing for ourselves , but that persons opptunity to do the LORDs work.

    Poping in with vB

    • Rosann

      YES Pamela! You hit the nail on the head! Thank you for your great comment. :)

  5. Shannon Milholland

    I have learned that when I accept needed help, I am a bigger blessing to the giver than they are to me. When I say no I deprive a friend of a blessing.

    • Rosann

      Such a good point Shannon. When we are in need, we have an opportunity to bless the friend trying to bless us! :)

  6. Christina

    This is so true for so many of us. Just today, I offered my time and love to a dear friend who is dealing with a tragic health problem of her husband. Every part of me is offering out of love and concern. Will she take me up on it? Probably not...and that hurts a little. We really have to keep in mind when we are offered assistance, it is offered with love and our "stubborn pride" is keeping us from accepting love from those who care about us.

    • Rosann

      I totally hear you Christina and you make a wonderful point. When we say no to others who offer help out of love, we are really hurting them a little bit, not to mention stealing their joy in being able to bless someone. Saying a prayer for your friend and her husband.

  7. great reminder! Thank you!! I am too often guilty of being stubborn :)

    • Rosann

      Glad you enjoyed the post Kristina!

  8. Jacqueline

    Rosann, I wish I could express how much joy I get reading your posts. I ALWAYS find a message in your posts and today is no different. I am SO guilty of the stubborn pride thing.... Something I must work on.

    • Rosann

      Jacqueline, your words just totally blessed me! Thank you!! :)

  9. Pamela / Pamela's Heavenly Treats

    Rosann this is a great post, I need to read this, because I am guilty of this, excepting help, and i know that I miss my blessing sometimes when I refuse, back in Feb it was our anniversary and we dont leave the kids ever, and a friend of mine said I will watch the 3 little ones and yall go out to lunch, I thought about it and then said no its ok, and I reflect on that and say i missed my blessing right there, with spending time with my hubbie without any kiddies. thanks again for this it is a great reminder.

    • Rosann

      Aww, Pamela you aren't alone in this. Trust me. It's a big issue for me as well. Plus it's so hard to leave our kids with others so we can enjoy our husband, isn't it? I often feel guilty doing that but try to make sure they understand the importance of mommy and daddy having time together. Happy belated Anniversary!!

      By the way, I still haven't made the cookies but have it scheduled up for something fun to do with the girls over the weekend. I'll let you know how delicious they are once we finish! :)

  10. Kristl

    "Do unto others" is what came to mind as I read this, and I hope in my times of need I can graciously welcome gestures of kindness.

  11. Sarah @ Loved Like the Church

    Oh, I can be a really prideful person. I told my SIL the other day, how even when I "need" help from people {like my friends helping me with my kids} I view it as a means to bless them with the opportunity to serve rather than the fact that I really can't do everything on my own. It's like I'm convinced I can do it on my own, but that it's easier with help. But in reality, I can't do it alone and I wouldn't make it without help. Sigh. Prideful much?

    God's been throwing me some pretty heavy curve balls to knock away at my pride in the last 6 months. I'm slowly {slowly} humbling myself.

    • Rosann

      Sarah, I hear you loud and clear dear friend. As moms, it's so easy to just know we've got it all under control, but even in the all important role of motherhood God is telling us "have a humble heart."


  12. Val

    I think child #2 has helped me loosen my own reins on my pride. Sometimes you just need a hand and it is easier to accept if you intend to pay it forward. Beautiful post.

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